BROTHERHOOD

THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF BROTHERHOOD. THE BOND YOU HAD WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, YOUR FRATERNITY BUDDIES, OR SOMEONE YOU SERVED IN THE MILTARY WITH. THERE IS A BOND AMONG FIREFIGHTERS AND LAW ENFORCEMENT. THEN THERE IS ACTUAL BROTHERHOOD WITH SOMEONE YOU SHARE THE SAME BLOOD WITH. I HAVE A BROTHER, HOWEVER I DO NOT FEEL BROTHERHOOD. WE HAVE NEVER BEEN CLOSE NOR HAVE WE HAD ANYTHING IN COMMON WITH EACH OTHER. I HAVE HEARD OTHERS TALK ABOUT HOW WONDERFUL BROTHERHOOD FEELS, BUT I COME UP SHORT WHEN I SEARCH MY SELF FOR THIS WONDERFUL FEELING. KNOWING THAT SOMEONE WILL ALWAYS HAVE YOUR BACK AND BE ON YOUR SIDE REGARDLESS OF THE SITUATION IS NOT FAMILIAR TO ME IN THE SENSE OF THE TERM BROTHERHOOD. THE ANSWER HAS ALWAYS ELUDED ME.
I HAVE MY FAITH IN GOD, I HAVE MY WIFE. I HAVE READ AND HEARD ABOUT THE BROTHERHOOD SHARED BETWEEN ALCOHOLICS. I CAN SEE THE LIGHT OF THIS BROTHERHOOD STARTING TO SHINE THROUGH ON ME AND I HOPE IT IS EVERY BIT AS GLORIOUS AND WONDERFUL AS I HAVE IMAGINED IT WOULD BE. IN DOING SO, MAYBE I CAN FIND A WAY TO HAVE THAT SAME BROTHERHOOD WITH MY OWN BROTHER. MAYBE...

AMAZING ALCOHOLICS

THE OTHER DAY, I CAME ACROSS A 3RD EDITION BIG BOOK IN A RESALE SHOP.  IT WAS A BARGAIN AT ONLY FIFTY CENTS SO I BECAME THE NEW PROUD OWNER.  ON MY WAY HOME I STARTED TO WONDER IF AND WHEN A FIFTH EDITION MIGHT COME OUT.  THE PERSONAL STORIES IN THE BACK CHANGE TO KEEP UP AND STAY RELEVANT WITH MODERN TIMES.  I WONDERED IF BILL AND DOC BOB HAD EVER EVEN IMAGINED THAT DRUNKS WOULD BE ABLE TO READ ABOUT THIS CUNNING, BAFFLING, AND POWERFUL DISEASE ON A HANDHELD COMPUTER THAT FITS NEATLY IN A POCKET (AND OCCASIONALLY MAKES PHONE CALLS).  THEN IT OCCURRED TO ME...THE ORIGINAL 164 PAGES HAVE REMAINED ALMOST COMPLETELY UNCHANGED IN EIGHTY YEARS!!!  IS IT REALLY POSSIBLE THAT ALCOHOLICS DON'T CHANGE?  THE SAME THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, AND BEHAVIORS I HAVE ARE IDENTICAL TO A MAN WHO WAS BORN BEFORE MR. FORD STARTED MAKING MODEL T'S?!?  AN ALCOHOLIC PROBABLY READ THE VERY SAME BIG BOOK WHILE EATING A SANDWICH MADE ON NEWLY INVENTED "SLICED BREAD".  NOW, I CAN READ THE BIG BOOK ON MY TABLET WITH WIRELESS INTERNET AS I RIDE AROUND ON MY HOVER-BOARD AND HAVE A SANDWICH ON SLICED BREAD DELIVERED TO ME IN AN ELECTRIC CAR!  BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?  IT'S STILL THE SAME BOOK AND IT STILL WORKS! IT'S REALLY AMAZING IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT AND IT REINFORCES THE FACT THAT THIS IS A DISEASE.  STAY SOBER, TRUST YOUR HIGHER POWER, AND KEEP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING!

Check out Father Joseph Martin

https://youtu.be/sqKvijuc89k

UNDER THE STONE

WHEN YOU LOOK AT ME, YOU MAY SEE A GUY WHO IS VERY CALM AND QUIET.  A GUY WHO KEEPS HIS EMOTIONS UNDER CONTROL AND RARELY LETS THEM SHOW.  THE STONY EXTERIOR OF AN UNMOVABLE MOUNTAIN.  BUT IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME, YOU WOULD NEVER TAKE ME TO SEE A SAD MOVIE.  I'M THE BIG GUY WHO BURSTS INTO TEARS.  YOU WOULD KNOW I'M THE GUY WHO GETS FIGHTING MAD WHEN HANDICAPPED OR SPECIAL-NEEDS PEOPLE GET PICKED ON.  I'M THE GUY WHO BUYS HIS WIFE ROSES FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON AT ALL.  IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME, YOU WOULD SEE THE SHAME AND GUILT I FEEL AT THE MERE MENTION OF ALCOHOL.  YOU WOULD KNOW HOW BRUISED AND BROKEN I AM FROM BEATING MYSELF UP.  YOU MIGHT EVEN BE ABLE TO HEAR THE HURTFUL WORDS I HAVE UNLEASHED IN A FIT OF DRUNKEN ANGER AND REALIZED TOO LATE THAT I COULD NOT TAKE THEM BACK.  IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME, YOU COULD FEEL THE LOVE I SO GENEROUSLY GIVE TO MY FAMILY WHEN I AM SOBER.  YOU WOULD SEE HOW COURTEOUS AND HELPFUL I CAN BE TO PEOPLE IN NEED.  I WAS HAPPY ONCE, AND I SO DESPERATELY WANT TO BE HAPPY AGAIN.  BUT YOU WOULD KNOW THAT...IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME.

A GOODBYE LETTER TO ALCOHOL

DEAR ALCOHOL,
HEY OLD BUDDY.  I HAD TO GO AWAY FOR A WHILE AND I FIGURED YOU WERE PROBABLY WONDERING WHERE I'VE BEEN.  ACTUALLY, I HAVE TO BE HONEST WITH YOU...WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS ANYMORE.  YOU'VE BEEN WITH ME WHEN THINGS WERE GOOD, AND WHEN THINGS WERE BAD, AND WHEN THINGS WERE JUST...THINGS.  BUT, I'VE COME TO REALIZE THAT YOU WEREN'T A VERY GOOD FRIEND TO ME.  YOU'VE HURT ME.  YOU'VE HURT MY FAMILY.  YOU'VE TAKEN SO MUCH AWAY FROM ME THAT I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHO I AM ANYMORE.  I USED TO BE FULL OF LIFE, ACTIVE, AND HAD LOTS OF FRIENDS.  NOW YOU KEEP ME ALL TO YOURSELF AND I AM DULL AND LIFELESS.  YOU MAKE ME LOSE MY TEMPER AND YELL AT MY WIFE.  YOU'VE DRAINED ALL MY HOPES AND AMBITIONS AND REPLACED THEM WITH NEGATIVITY.  YOU ARE THE RELENTLESS, WICKED LITTLE VOICE IN MY EAR THAT TELLS ME I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH.  I LEARNED TO LOVE YOU, AND NOW I'VE LEARNED TO HATE YOU.  YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE ANYMORE.  I KNOW YOU WILL FIND MANY MORE FRIENDS TO REPLACE ME.  MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON THEIR SOULS.  GOODBYE.

WELCOME

SORRY I TYPE IN ALL CAPS.  JUST ANOTHER ONE OF MY BAD HABITS.  I HAVE BEEN AN ALCOHOLIC FOR 15 YEARS AND FINALLY FOUND MY WAY INTO THE ROOMS.  I THANK GOD EVERYDAY FOR LEADING ME TO THIS PROGRAM.  SOBER LIFE IS A NEW AND WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE FOR ME.  I MADE THIS PAGE SO PEOPLE LIKE ME COULD POST HOW THEY FEEL EVERYDAY WITHOUT THE 'WHOLE WORLD' KNOWING ABOUT IT.  JUST OTHER DRUNKS WHO REALLY KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE.